Have We Destroyed Childhood?

We blame smartphones—but the problem might be us.September 4, 2026Illustration by Josie NortonEarly in the psychologist Peter Gray’s new book, “Restoring Childhood: How to Set Kids Free in the Age of Anxiety,” he proposes a thought experiment. “Imagine that your spouse or your closest friend had the same power over you that parents typically have over children,” he suggests. Although you’re an adult, this “loving person” insists that you never leave the house without an accompanying guardian or a G.P.S. tracker. When you return, they demand a full account of what you did. Frequently, they communicate with your boss, who “controls you the way a teacher controls children at school.” This boss reprimands you for arriving even a minute late, and prohibits you from talking with your co-workers